I am extremely fortunate to live in an area that supports natural birthing options, not everyone in the US has it so good. My husband and I have the option of a great certified nurse midwife practice that works in a hospital birthing center and bills through my OB’s office as well as a strong home birth midwife community in the area.
I wanted to make my selection within three weeks (before I am 12 weeks along) and I am basically 1 1/2 weeks out and wanting to decide now. The midwives I have talked to have said that for some reason June is booking up fast. They don’t know if people got especially busy in September or if it is in reaction to hospital policies changing after H1N1 has entered our lives (policies of suspect moms not seeing their newborns for 48 hours, children not allowed to see new siblings, etc.)
My hubby and I started the research process before we conceived by reading Ina May Gaskin’s Guide to Childbirth to learn about birth stories and the birthing process.
I gathered referrals via my yoga community, apothecary, and OB office. Some midwives had very detailed websites, some only had a name out there. The ones with the detailed websites are very good to basically have most of the details of their Informed Choice Agreements for you to read prior to meeting them. Others hand you the agreement when you meet them. The big thing is that they let you leave with this Informed Choice Agreement to ponder as you make your decision. It will be a multi-page document that includes their background, philosophy, responsibilities before, during, after the birth, and fees.
When you interview you want to go with questions. You can google “questions to ask your midwife” and find a lot of lists out there of things to ask. I think the most important thing is to find people you feel are qualified, and then pick the person(s) you have the best rapport with.
For me my big questions are:
- What is your birth philosophy?
- When do you schedule prenatal visits? Intervals and days/times of the week?
- How many births have you led and what are stats on those outcomes?
- When do you seek medical intervention? What won’t you do?
- What difficult situations have you encountered?
- When do you cut the cord?
- What do you think of the teddy bear placenta?
Sure things like accreditation and procedure are important and I have learned those from the website or agreement already. The time of prenatal visits matter because if they don’t fit in you and your significant others schedule it will not work. I want to hear the rest of these answers from them because they are part of the what-ifs when things do not go perfectly. The teddy bear question only gets asked to learn about their sense of humor. I need a midwife with a sense of humor. Honestly I think most people who become midwives are AMAZING. Beyond training it is just a matter of a personality you want to be around when you will be in physical discomfort.
So here I am. I met a beautiful set of women. The only thing missing is a woman of color, I wish I had the option of a woman who looked a little like me and maybe shared some of my life experiences. I did see one midwife who had a diverse practice so that put my mind at ease. On my desk are Informed Choice Agreements, pamphlets for home birth classes they recommend, my notes on payment options with my insurance, and trying to reconcile experience with personalities. My husband still has not talked with one (he couldn’t make it on time) and I want that piece of the puzzle done, what if they have a personality conflict? All I know is that we need to make a decision soon so that their schedules don’t get filled before we decide.